楼主可以讲个英语小笑话,【Kaiser3344】提供如下:
The First Day as a Taxi Driver
A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him a question. The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went up on the footpath, and stopped centimetres from a shop window.
乘客轻拍了一下出租车司机的肩膀,想问个问题. 司机大叫起来, 车也失去了控制, 几乎撞上一辆公车, 还上了便道, 在还差几厘米就撞上商店橱窗时终于停了下来.
The driver said, Look mate, don't ever do that again. You scared the daylights out of me! The passenger apologized and said, I didn't realize that a little tap would scare you so much. The driver replied, Sorry, it's not really your fault. Today is my first day as a cab driver. I've been driving a funeral van for the last 25 years.
司机说,伙计,别再这么干了. 你把我吓破胆了!乘客抱歉地说, 我没想到拍你一下就吓成这样. 司机说,对不起,也不全是你的错. 今天是我第一天开出租. 以前25年里我一直开殡葬车。
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Ladies and gentlemen, it's my honor to be here today to give you this speech. My topic is "the pains of growing up"
When i was a child, I hoped to grow up immediately. However, having grown up, how I wish i were a child! Once we grow up, the carefree times have flown away and there are so many pains waiting for us!
First comes the pains of studying. Exactly, studying itself is pleasant. What pains us are examinations and scores. We have to study those boring subjects and try to get high scores in exams. It's really painful.
We also suffer from dealing with others. Sometimes we may find that some people are hard to get along with. Sometimes we may quarrel with intimate friends. Such things always hurt our feelings.
Parents may bring us pains, too. We think they don't understand us. They forbid us to do what interests us and force us to do what we hate. They keep telling us what to do and what not to do as is we knew noting. They don't really care what is in our mind.
Later, some may suffer pains of losing love, pains of working and then of suppoting a family.
Growing up seems to mean endless pains,. So many people wish to return to childhood.
But you know, that's impossible. We can do nothing but stand up and overcome them, even enjoy them and shoulder our responsibilities.
My dear classmates, don't be afraid of growing up! Don't be afraid of pains. No pains, no gains. Only after tasting pains can we better enjoy sweetness and happiness. Let's grow up in pains, grow up from pains.
Thank you!